Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Lots of changes

Well we've had lots of new developments since my last blog. I really need to be better about posting on a regular basis.. but you know how it goes - life always seems to get in the way.
Not too much new news on my job front. I am still working (thank goodness) and my office has not relocated yet so I am still working in the office as opposed to being at home, which was the original plan starting June 1st. I did however have to move Alex to his new school on the 1st, and more about that in a moment. I am still very wary about the job thing. I do not feel like I have much direction at all on where my job is going (figuratively as well as literally) and that makes me uneasy. So I am trying to ride it out while I can and see what happens. I just have a bad feeling that it's not going to be a long term plan .. and that saddens me. I've been here 6 years, which is longer than I've been at any job and until recently I have always loved my job. There are SO many people out there that are being laid off and losing their jobs, and I feel so badly for them. I know I have no right to complain about the job I DO have.
So about school... Friday was his last day at his old school. I was very emotional leading up to his last day but actually did ok on the actual day. Only because his (and my) 2 favorite teachers were already gone for the day. Had they been there, all bets would've been off. His teacher wrote a very nice note on his daily sheet and if I'd read that while I was still there, I'd have lost it. But at least I made it to the car before I started crying, which is better than I thought I'd do. They have been so wonderful with him and he loves them. I hated taking that away from him. But with my job moving ... it just made practical sense.
So that takes us to yesterday. First day at the new school. Did fine until I had to hand him to the teacher ... and the flood gates opened. First for Alex, then of course for me. :( The teacher took him and he started crying and reaching out for me. We left, knowing that was the "right" thing to do. But we stood in the hallway, watching through the one way glass. He was still crying. I drove home (still crying myself) and logged into the wonderful world of video monitoring that his new school has, and he was fine. He was sitting off to the side playing by himself. Which is fine, but I felt bad for him. At his old school, he was one of four kids in his class and always had individual attention. Here, he is one of 12 and I just felt bad that he wasn't playing with anyone. You know how it is being the "new kid". (Yea they're only 15-18 mos and they don't technically "play" together, but still... ) When we left the school, the director told us everything will be fine and to give it 2 weeks. He will adjust just fine. I think I truly believe now that parents live vicariously through their children. I was feeling his pain of being in a new place, surrounded by strangers... and my heart hurt for him. But I know kids are resilient, and he'll be just fine. But that moment, when your child is crying and reaching for you, and you have to hand him to a stranger and leave... that's heartwrenching.
So this morning ... same thing. Except I was sitting at home watching my husband drop him off. He still cried, and reached out for him. But after about 10 min he seemed fine. I've logged on a few times today and he's been playing.
And on Sunday ..... drum roll please...... Alex took several steps (several times!) on his own!! Yay! Praise the Lord! We've waited so long for this day. And he's gone through so much to get here. I was SO excited for him. Below is a little video of it. He would literally catapult himself onto us when he'd reach us so I had to be quick with the camera but I think I captured the jist of it. :) And he was SO excited for himself which made it even that much better. By the end of the day, he was walking much further than in the video. The only catch is he'll only do it if we stand him up and point him in the right direction. He needs to figure out he can stand up on his own and I know he'll get there.
So that's what's new in our little world. I'll try to post more often - promise!